I have been evaluating my life for the past few months, gathering my thoughts and whatnot. One of the many things that have popped into my mental a few times was a conversation I had with a cousin a few years ago. She talked about how she feels that she has to put on a mask in order to be around certain people…or something to that effect…
My current feelings towards our conversation are a bit more mature. I have had the time to go through some truly “Adult” shyt! I have noticed that in the last 5 years, I have acquired many different “titles/labels” that I never conceptualized that I would. In the same breath, I have picked up a mask that goes along with each position that must be played. I have NEVER had the problem of picking the right mask for the occasion, but lately, I have been feeling like I don’t even know what my face looks like anymore.
What I have begun to realize lately is that I have stretched myself entirely too thin! It is tiring trying switching masks to accommodate the different people that I tend to run into daily. I pretty sure they do not notice when I change, but I still try not to draw attention either way. It is just becoming tiresome…changing for the many people…
Then I start to think about it a little deeper:
What if the people I interact with are wearing a mask for similar or even different reasons than me? Are my actions toward certain people based merely off of a reaction they have come to expect from “people of the world”? Am I causing people to approach me with a mask that they have customized for me? Do I NEED so many different masks…could I use just one? Does a mask even need to be used at all?