Letting Go

Prior to the passing of my cousin, I made it a point to change my cover photo on Facebook  once a month. It has not changed since Thanksgiving Day of 2012. 



The world may never know how this passing has affected my family, but even as I write these worlds, I feel I myself have not properly mourned. Honestly, It is a hard battle to continue living this life with a cloak of invulnerability…like NOTHING in this world has an impact on self…

…even the smallest of actions could have a mountainous ripple…

…
..
.

Imagine Mount Everest dropping peak first into a thimble of water…

..

…yea….

…

…somin like that….


NÜK

When Being Real Was Real

Looking around at the people in & around my life I can see how some people don’t even know how to be themselves. Its a sad thing really. I can notice when I walk into a room how a persons whole entire expression can & will change. I have noticed that some people even switch their vocal tone, pattern & infliction when they come around certain types of people. I might even do thi….well…I KNOW I do this! But I don’t do it to deceive a person…its just that white people think I be yelling at them when its just my natural speaking voice….

*shrugs*

I’ve been studied!!! I have a stride that must be unlike no other!!! People have imitated it while mocking my stroll…its funny to me!!! But that is my naturalness. I didn’t watch myself on tape practicing the PERFECT swag. But there are people who do that….

My fam bam in Cali said “Real is the new Fake! I’m Authentic!!!” Im have to start saying that shyt because Im Original to the fullest!!! But I also ca not deny my influences that have shaded who I have become. But even if that is the case…there will NEVER be another quite like me….

NÜK

The Divided States of America

Without going into TOO many details…

I was having a conversation with a pissed of man from Africa. In so many words, the conversation was all about “fairness”. He didn’t quite comprehend how come this country is not “fair”. I had to ask:

What is fair???

It is OBVIOUS to see that THIS country has been divided. Whites vs Blacks vs Mexicans vs Homosexuals vs PETA vs Ruth’s Steakhouse….everybody is in on this separation thing. I have been noticing that we focus more on our differences than what makes us TRULY unique.

I don’t have a problem with gay people wanting to get married and being given credits like a hetro couple. I have ZERO issue with that!!! Let them do that shyt!!! I DO have a problem with it ending up as me being intolerant for not giving a fuck….

No matter how fucked up I think it is or how fucked up of a person I feel Ü are mentally, but if a female want to transform into a “male” but still keep all of it’s female parts so it can become pregnant….

o_o

SURE!!!! Go Ahead!!!! Do That Shyt Son!!!! I gives NO fuck playa!!!! Do Ü….
But if people start giving Ü confused looks…don’t ask why…Ü should know that!!!

Me & the African started speaking so much about the “fairness” and all of its ways that he suggested the country’s land be divided and the people of the soils move to where they are most comfortable. Together with their own kinds. Each with their own military & Government…everybody having their own way of doing things & just living by that.

I honestly loved the ideal!!!

The only problem is…I believe that the people of this country LOVE to be in the middle of drama. This type of shyt is what makes the country continue to go around!!! This country has a “News” channel that makes shyt up for ratings. This country has had presidents that didn’t give a fuck about what is going on with the people inside its own walls. I mean, how do Ü start a war, bomb civilians & them send them supplies when multiple cities in your own country need supplies???

Shyt just doesnt make any sense…it used to…but it just started to slowly fade into the darkness of the light.

As I left the conversation, I could help but think about all that I currently know & all that I have no idea about. I made me mad…then I got excited…then I got angry…then I realized that I am not the issue. I did NOT make this country the way it currently is…and I REFUSE to take part in what this place is becoming…this is a hard & dangerous road ahead…

United WE Stand
Divided THEY Fall

NÜK

Bless Ü

I have truly been working on blessing people BEFORE they sneeze!!! It is one of the hardest tasks I have placed upon myself. In the end, I only want to accomplish more sense of connection with those who I can bless with a blessing. As much as possible & within my power to do so…

Bless!!!

NÜK

Challange Yaself!!!

I actually challenge Ü to challenge yourself!!!

I mean…

When was the last time Ü had an actual challenge???
Something that made Ü a better person because Ü made it???

The BEST thing about this challenge?
I will do it with Ü!!!
Ill try to be there all the way!!!

But Ü gotta do it tho…

…I will know if Ü didn’t…

Cause i WILL ask about it later…

Im SURE that if Ü did it Ü would tell me what Ü accomplished!!!

NÜK

I have told the story MANY times over the past 5.5 years…but yesterday… I told my brother exactly how it happened…step by step…and as I did that…I was RIGHT BACK behind that wheel. I saw the streetlights…the road…the curve…I felt the speed…the momentum… … …and the impact… … I felt the friction of me sliding […]

Death To Science!!!!!

I have been through a LOT in life that has tested my faith. I can say without a doubt that my faith has brought me to the current point I am in life. Honestly, while the last 5 months have been interesting in SO many ways, I have not wrote about some MAJOR events that have shaped the world around me. I mean….

I have told y’all about the Africans, the Nepalis, the “White & Black” people, Time and the crackhead who locked a broken fence….

But I truly didn’t think ya’ll wanted to read about the stripper, the bloody tampon, the fights, lies & even a dayum dog whose existence I have to be aware of now…

…

So early this week, my head nearly exploded in the most pointless & idiotic of debates I have ever had in my LIFE!!! For two point five days…I  argued a person who “Doesn’t believe in Science”…

õ_õ

And Ü know what???

Because of the memories its bring back to me….I can’t continue writing this shyt….

*smh*

NÜK

Lackluster Loyalty

I have been taking a deeper look at my surroundings lately. The people in and around them are in dire situations…some could care less. This worries me on multiple levels. 

I KNOW people can’t always be 100 at ALL times, EVERY time! But I truly expect people to  be reliant when it matters most. I believe that I put my faith in people that will abuse it in the worst of ways…

Changing my nature would be adverse to why I am who I am…
Pretending that shit like this doesn’t affect me is a lie. 

I don’t have a violent nature. I DO have anger issues & a strong sense of together & closeness. Separating me from those things is like…trying to test me in a way…

…

In an effort of keeping myself for becoming something & someone I am not, I will distance myself from issues of concern. Pulling away from certain things will be easier to do than others. I almost have to change my life to become who I always was…

…I just was never that loyal to myself…

…I guess…

NÜK

Profiled

I know a LOT of people!

I have about 15 different area codes worth of people I have personally met in my phone. I myself have 2 different area codes. But nothing compares to my actual social circle. And  Im not talking about this internet connection we have acquired as of late either….

Yesterday I held a conversation with this cat from Kenya. My dude is a refugee!!! He told me about how Kenyans don’t like Americans & the murder rate is SERIOUS! He said that If I were to go there (which seemed like a challenge!) I would have to stay in a compound for a while to get adjusted to my surroundings. He intends on going back in a few years & hiring bodyguards for personal protection.

I then spoke to man from Sudan……then he laughed and said, “Well, its South Sudan now! But is where I am from”! So I inquire about the separation of Sudan. He told me it was over religious beliefs and people were killing each other over such things. North Sudan is  now of Muslim belief & South Sudan is Christian. He left because he did not want to deal with the war. But after being here 9 years, he intends on returning….

Ohkay…

So, back here in a America, why do I have a problem with a person who KNOWS what to address me as, yet, refuses to do so in favor of something else of his choosing???

Its cool…
               …I guess….

*shrugs*

From the outside looking in….

But once a person steps foot inside the house and becomes AWARE of the situation??? Going back home in a time of war isn’t a big deal to some people…. 

NÜK

Make It Happen #Lyrics

Hook

You might recognize my face when I walk these streets, Im a local celebrity
I know so many people when I go any place, my reality’s like TV
So fresh so clean, when I step on the scene my reflections tryna get like me
Bet you I make money, a couple moves, I aint trappin’, I make it happen

V-1

The Young Man might put you on stand by -
Cause every move that I make in this game’s like chess
You might as well say good bye to the bad guy
And if he think he Superman Ima take that S from his chest
Independent but liven’ the life major
My word good, the lyrics keeping me paid
Since I dropped a mixtape, called it Interstate
Its heavy on the concept, but what Im tryna say
I push rhymes like weight ( like weight?) across the country
Check the pay Pal to see if ya sent the money
Then Im on my way ( on my way! ) I don’t think you understand it
The crew ain’t starved, my fam famished
A good investment gives you more than what you paid for
I grip the mic and then I show you what its made for
Bought some acres, definition of a landlord
Shaking hands when I put stamps on the passport

(Hook)

Bet there’ll never ever be another like me, thats why you like me
I go hyphy ( Yup!) in a white T
A cyborg in the mind I don’t sleep
In the same Girbauds I had on for bout a week
Hustle and flipping’ been given em what they want
Put D Frank down in Atlanta he got crunk
The West Coast want that dope from my throat
And the Midwest bang that funk from they trunk
Finna take it worldwide, I don’t think you over-stand it
Put it on the internet and took it across the planet
I make money and moves, thats hereditary
The hustle different cause the skill set legendary
My arts deep, Im spittn unwritten gospel
Paitin’ vivid pictures lyrical Pablo Picasso
I wrote the code of DiVinci not Leonardo
Shocked the world tryna blow up like the Apollo

(Hook)

NÜK